Heel Clicks And Circles

Today, we had quite a JV service if I do say so myself. God started working in praise and worship and kept on until way after. I was still dancing in Wal-Mart… 

But during the end service I got this idea. In a way it relates to the circle I mentioned in my last post. The circle of God’s love and holiness. So I’m not sure what to call this thing but here it is;

The holier You are, the dirtier I am.

The dirtier I am, the deeper I recognize Your grace.

The deeper Your grace, the the greater Your love.

The greater Your love, the more I want to return it.

The more I want to return it, the purer I yearn to become.

The purer I yearn to become, the harder it is for me to accomplish.

The harder it is to accomplish, the more in need You.

The more I need You the more I spend time with You.

The more I spend time with You, the more I am satisfied, fulfilled, guided and once again, I see how holy You are.

And that, to me, is the circle of life they do not teach in science class.

The Delicate Balance

I have so many thoughts running through my head right now, I’m not sure how to start.

I’ve been thinking about having a balance of the fear of the Lord and the love of the Lord. But mostly about the fear of the Lord. It’s been on my heart  mostly during my church’s JV service. I look around during worship, as we sing a song about God’s holiness, and I have to wonder if some understand what they’re singing. Do we truly understand the words we’re lifting, or do we just pay lip service like my pastor would say? ‘Cause your worship life explodes when you gain a healthy fear of the Lord.

The fear of God baffled me for a very long time. See, when I begun my personal relationship with God, it was based on His love. His love overwhelmed me, captivated me, and completely delighted me. It was, and is, what satisfies me. The God I knew was the God of love. But I didn’t get the fear of the Lord. I couldn’t seem to grasp it.

I remember in the beginning of this year, things just kept coming up that talked about the fear of God and it challenge me to understand it. I kept praying that God would teach me about the fear of Him.

Finally one night I ended up reading Isaiah 6:1-8 for some reason. I’d read it before, and I’d always liked the scripture. Just didn’t understand it. Or at least, not as deeply as I did that night. Suddenly I got a glimpse of how holy God is, how unclean I am, and why I should fear Him. As I wrote in my journal, once you get a little look at why you should fear Him, all you want to do is worship and fear Him. And I’ll quote this straight from my journal,

“When you finally grasp the true beauty and awe of the only pure and holy One, the effect is life changing. When you truly grasp how unworthy we are, it opens doors to a deeper walk with God. It breaks and humbles you to such a desperation to get all of God you can, because without Him we are nothing.

The understanding of this also leads to a deeper feeling for the unsaved and lost. Its all a big circle.”

Another part of that circle is taking all I’d learned about God’s love, and all I knew now about fearing God, and tying them together. God is love, and God is holy. If I wasn’t amazed enough with just knowing God loved me, now I realized how dirty I was, and knew He still loved me. Then I was really amazed. As holy as He is, He still loves us. Such a beautiful circle. Love, fear. Fear, love.

I like the way the senior pastor of my church put it. He used the illustration of one of the water plane things(I don’t know what they’re really called.). I think they have pontoon things they land with? Something like that. But my Pastor explain that if the pontoons didn’t touch down at the same time- if they weren’t balanced with one another- the plane could go out of control(or something dangerous like that.). He said he viewed those two pontoons as the fear and love for God, its important we have the right balance of both.

Fear of the Lord. Love of the Lord. I wish I could pack it into a boxes and give it to people.